Tuesday, December 27, 2005

New Year's Eve

Today was Boxing Day. I was invited to my friend’s house for lunch , and had a marvellous time there. Everything was going so perfectly before I went to work at 6:00 P.M. A few weeks ago,I gave my manager a notice that I wasn’t going to be available to work on 31st of December, as it’s New Year’s Eve. Today, when I went to pick up my roster, I realised that he’s given me a shift on that night. At first, I thought that was some kind of mistake as I had talked to him about it before. So, what I did was, I went to his office, and explained the situation to him one more time. I told him that I’ve already made plans for that night and that I’m not going to be able to work that night. In return he said, ‘tough luck mate’. (I want you to know that at this point in time I was talking in such a nice manner). I told him that I’m definitely not going to be able to make it, and it was then that he called me a ‘f****** middle eastern’. And it was then that I lost my composure. And I said ‘you know what? I quit’, and then I just stormed out of his office.

I don’t know if that was the smartest thing that I could’ve said and done, but that’s what I did. And up till this point, I don’t have any regrets. I have always thought of myself as being calm and easy going. I don’t know what happened tonight. I guess I lost it when he insulted me with his racial remarks.

Friday, December 23, 2005


Thursday, December 22, 2005

How an awkward boy joined a sordid online world

JUSTIN BERRY sat at home in California, eyes fixed on a computer screen. He had never run with the popular crowd, and long ago had turned to the internet for the friends he craved. But on this day, the 13-year-old's fascination with cyberspace would change his life.
Weeks before, Justin hooked up a web camera, hoping to use it to meet other teenagers online. Instead, he heard only from men, who chatted with him by instant message as they watched his image on the internet. To Justin, they seemed just like friends, ready with compliments and always offering gifts.
Then one day in 2000, a man sent a proposal: he would pay Justin $US50 to sit bare-chested in front of the webcam for three minutes. He even helped Justin open an account online. "I figured, I took off my shirt at the pool for nothing," Justin told The New York Times this year. "So, I was kind of like, what's the difference?"
So began Justin's secret life of selling images of his body over the internet. Over five years he made hundreds of thousands of dollars performing in front of the webcam - undressing, showering, masturbating and even having sex - for an audience of more than 1500 people, many of whom were doctors, lawyers, businessmen and teachers, a Times investigation has revealed.
Justin's father also took an interest in his pornographic career. For a share of the profits, Justin says, Knute Berry procured prostitutes for Justin to have sex with in front of the webcam.
Justin's story is not unique. Minors, often under the tutelage of adults, are opening sites featuring their images, for a fee, sent onto the internet by inex-pensive webcams. They perform from the privacy of home.
The business has created youthful porn stars - with nicknames like Riotboyy and Miss Honey - whose images are traded long after their sites have gone. In this world teenagers announce to subscribers when they will next masturbate and eager customers can even buy "private shows", in which teenagers sexually perform while following real-time instructions.
A six-month investigation by the Times found that such sites emerged largely unnoticed by authorities. "We've been aware of the use of the webcam and its potential use by exploiters," said Ernest Allen, chief of the National Centre for Missing and Exploited Children. "But this is a variation on a theme that we haven't seen. It's unbelievable."
Some children end up as pornographic commodities inadvertently, appearing naked on webcams as a joke only to have their images put on sale. One website claims it has 140,000 images of "adolescents in cute panties exposing themselves on their teen webcams".

The scale of webcam pornography is unknown, because it is both new and extremely secretive. At least 585 for-pay webcam sites listed on one advertising portal were created by teenagers. In interviews with the Times this year, Justin Berry, now 19, provided evidence that other children were being exploited.
The Times persuaded Justin to abandon his business and contact the Justice Department. Investigators began arresting the people he identified as pornographers and traffickers in September and have targeted businesses that have aided these illegal sites, including credit card processors.
Monique Winkis, an FBI agent handling the case, said: "The fact we are getting so many potential targets, people who knowingly bought into a child pornographic website, could lead to hundreds of other subjects and potentially save hundreds of other kids that we are not aware of yet."
Thanks to Justin's co-operation, authorities say they have obtained a rare guide into this secluded online world.
"I didn't want these people to hurt any more kids," Justin said of his decision to turn federal witness. "I didn't want anyone else to live the life I lived."
Justin's teenage years make for harrowing reading but what is worrying is that his life before 2000 was like that of many American adolescents.
In 2000 he was a gangly 13-year-old who lived with his mother, stepfather and younger sister in Bakersfield, a midsized city north of Los Angeles.
Already he was so adept at the computer that he had registered his own small internet business, which he ran from his bedroom.
He was especially fascinated by webcams. "I didn't really have a lot of friends," he recalled, "and I thought having a webcam might help me make some new ones online, maybe even meet some girls my age."
As soon as he hooked one to his computer and loaded the software, his picture was automatically posted on spotlife.com, an internet directory of webcam users, along with his contact information. Then he waited to hear from other teenagers.
No one his age ever contacted him from that listing, only men.
Justin remembers his earliest conversations with these men were non-threatening and pleasant. His new friends were also generous. One explained how to put together a "wish-list" on Amazon.com, where Justin could ask for anything - computer equipment, toys, music CDs or movies.
But mostly the men filled the emotional void in Justin's life. His relationship with his real father was troubled. His parents divorced when he was young and the turmoil left Justin longing for paternal affection. "They complimented me all the time," Justin said. "They told me I was smart, they told me I was handsome."

Justin's mother, Karen Page, said she sensed nothing out of the ordinary, believing him to be a boy with a knack for computers. Whenever she asked about his new technology and money, Justin told her they were fruits of his internet development business. In a way, it was true: with one fan's help, he had by then opened his own pornographic site, called justinscam.com.
Justin began to feel he belonged to something important, a broad community of teenagers with their own businesses. Collectively, they were known by a name now commonplace in internet subculture - camwhores.
From the relative safety of his bedroom, Justin did not fully understand the dangers his fans posed. However, it was not long before he was lured from his home. A man he met online invited him to Michigan to attend a computer camp. Justin's mother allowed him to go, thinking the camp was worthwhile.
Justin said the man molested him, and again when he invited Justin back to Michigan on the promise of sex with a girl.
In early 2003 Justin's offline life began to unravel. A former classmate found pornographic videos from Justin's website, made copies, and distributed them around town, including to students at Justin's school. Justin said was taunted and beaten.
Then came another traumatic event. Knute Berry fled to Mexico after being charged with fraud related to the massage clinics he ran. Justin begged to join him, and his father agreed.
In Mexico, Justin's seemingly endless supply of money made his father suspicious. Justin confessed the details of his webcam business, and the reunion became a collaboration. Justin created a new website, which featured him having live sex with prostitutes. It was an immensely popular site, making Justin one of the internet's most sought after underage pornography stars. Justin said he shared the profits with his father in exchange for his father helping procure the prostitutes.
By the end of the year, Justin's life took a new turn when a subscriber named Greg Mitchel, a 36-year-old fast food restaurant manager from Virginia, asked to visit him. Seeing a chance to make more money, Justin agreed.
Over the next few months, Mitchel allegedly molested Justin many times. He is now in prison awaiting trial on six child pornography charges.
In 2004 Justin tried repeatedly to break free of this life. He roamed the US. He contemplated suicide and for a time sought solace in Christianity.
In June that year the Times anonymously made contact with Justin online. Although he feared this new contact might be an FBI agent, he agreed to a meeting. He says part of him hoped he would be arrested.

Over the next few days Justin revealed to the Times the inner workings of webcam pornography. He said he wanted to make his mother and grandmother proud of him.
He agreed to abandon his pornography business and talk to the authorities.
In late July, Justin met the FBI and identified children he believed were in the hands of adult predators. He listed the marketers, credit card processors and others who supported webcam child pornography. He also described the documentary evidence he had retained on his hard drives: financial information and transcripts of conversations with his customers.
Prosecutors agreed to grant Justin immunity, and he became a federal witness. FBI agents and prosecutors have targeted numerous potential defendants. Hundreds of thousands of computer files - including emails carrying vast array of illegal images - have been seized from around the country.
Justin himself has found a measure of control over his life. He revealed the details of his secret life to his family, has sought counselling, resumed his connection with his church and plans to attend college.
He has even recently returned to his mother's home in California. Before he left Ms Page drove him to the airport. Hugging him as they said goodbye, she said that the son she once knew had finally returned. Then, as tears welled in her eyes, she told him that she and his grandmother were proud of him.

I got this article from www.smh.com.au

Sunday, December 18, 2005

First date

This was on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Jay wentinto the audience to find the most embarrassing firstdate that a woman ever had.The winner described her worst first date experience. She said it was midwinter... snowing and quitecold...and the guy had taken her skiing to somewhere.It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers,after all, and truly had never met before.The outing was fun but relatively uneventful untilthey were headed home late that afternoon.They were driving back down the mountain, when shegradually began to realize that she should not havehad that extra latte.They were about an hour away from anywhere with arestroom and in the middle of nowhere! There came apoint where she told him that he had better stop andlet her pee beside the road, or it would be the frontseat of his car. They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside thecar, yanked her trousers down and started.Unfortunately, in the deep snow she didn't have goodfooting, so leaned her bum to rest against the rearfender to steady herself. Her companion stood on theside of the car watching for traffic and indeed was areal gentleman and refrained from peeking.All she could think about was the relief she feltdespite the rather embarrassing nature of thesituation. Upon finishing however, she soon becameaware of another sensation.As she bent to pull up her trousers, the young ladydiscovered her buttocks were firmly glued against thecar's fender.Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor sheanswered her date's concerns about what is taking solong with a reply that indeed, she was freezing herbum off and in need of some assistance.He came around the car as she tried to cover herselfwith her sweater and then, as she looked imploringlyinto his eyes, he burst out laughing.Both agreed it would take something hot to free herchilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!They both quickly realized that there was only one wayto get her free. So, as she looked the other way, herfirst-time date proceeded to unzip his trousers andpee her bum off the fender.As for the Tonight Show... she took the prize handsdown... or perhaps that should be trousers down. And you thought your first date was embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment - - - -This gives a whole newmeaning to being pissed off.

Thursday, December 15, 2005


The majority of politicians, on the evidence available to us, are interested not in truth but in power and in the maintenance of that power. To maintain that power it is essential that people remain in ignorance, that they live in ignorance of the truth, even the truth of their own lives. What surrounds us therefore is a vast tapestry of lies, upon which we feed. ....The crimes of the United States have been systematic, constant, vicious, remorseless, but very few people have actually talked about them. You have to hand it to America. It has exercised a quite clinical manipulation of power worldwide while masquerading as a force for universal good. It's a brilliant, even witty, highly successful act of hypnosis.I put to you that the United States is without doubt the greatest show on the road. Brutal, indifferent, scornful and ruthless it may be but it is also very clever. As a salesman it is out on its own and its most saleable commodity is self love. It's a winner.... Language is actually employed to keep thought at bay.....The United States no longer bothers about low intensity conflict. It no longer sees any point in being reticent or even devious. It puts its cards on the table without fear or favour. It quite simply doesn't give a damn about the United Nations, international law or critical dissent, which it regards as impotent and irrelevant.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005


This movie was amazing to say the least. I cannot even write about it because I would not even be doing it any justice. I highly recommend this movie to anyone who would like to see an extremely thought-provoking film. It is brillantly casted and the writing is phenomenal. I saw this movie months ago and I am still thinking about it. It is an extremely realistic portrayal of the racism that still lingers around us. Amazing!
Do yourself a favour and SEE THIS MOVIE! We are all connected. We are all brothers and sisters. If you don't believe that, then you MUST see this movie!